Great piece on what is an emotional but also cruelly visceral experience. I've only managed to tell one other person 'the details' of what we went though, so bravo for the unflinching words.
I found this Substack the other day and it is just amazing, truly. A mix of serious, interesting, funny, uplifting. Amazing work [and I jumped on signing on ParentData, of course, numbers and parenting, my whole world].
Even after seven years since the last miscarriage, even after having two pregnancies come to fruition as my middle and my youngest children, I still absolutely hate reading or listening the verb "abort" in general [in Brazilian Portuguese, we do not have a separate word for abortion or miscarriage in general use; both are "aborto" and the related verb is "abortar"; we do have "vingar", which is quite the complicated verb and has other unrelated meanings ("avenge")] - so, whenever someone says they had to "abort mission", I get this terrible feeling inside.
I avoid the subject as much as I can, except when I am talking to younger men looking to have kids. Then, I tell them that nobody talks about them, but miscarriages do happen and they can mean mostly nothing for some and can be devastating for others.
Thanks Hugo. I didn't really realise I wanted kids until we kept 'losing' (another ineffective word) pregnancies. We've had two since, but my wife in particular talks about the others several years later.
Thank you for this.
Great piece on what is an emotional but also cruelly visceral experience. I've only managed to tell one other person 'the details' of what we went though, so bravo for the unflinching words.
Thanks Stuart.
I almost cried. I can feel my eyes watering, I think the only reason I haven’t. Im in public.
Im a step-parent, and my partner and I are currently not trying, but fuck. For some reason. This got to me.
Great article!
I felt the same when Matt sent it.
I knew it would find the right kind of parents—and step-parents, and parents-to-be—here.
Thanks Dan.
Absolutely brilliant writing about a topic that isn’t spoken about enough, thanks for putting this out there.
Thanks Jon.
I found this Substack the other day and it is just amazing, truly. A mix of serious, interesting, funny, uplifting. Amazing work [and I jumped on signing on ParentData, of course, numbers and parenting, my whole world].
Even after seven years since the last miscarriage, even after having two pregnancies come to fruition as my middle and my youngest children, I still absolutely hate reading or listening the verb "abort" in general [in Brazilian Portuguese, we do not have a separate word for abortion or miscarriage in general use; both are "aborto" and the related verb is "abortar"; we do have "vingar", which is quite the complicated verb and has other unrelated meanings ("avenge")] - so, whenever someone says they had to "abort mission", I get this terrible feeling inside.
I avoid the subject as much as I can, except when I am talking to younger men looking to have kids. Then, I tell them that nobody talks about them, but miscarriages do happen and they can mean mostly nothing for some and can be devastating for others.
Thanks Hugo. I didn't really realise I wanted kids until we kept 'losing' (another ineffective word) pregnancies. We've had two since, but my wife in particular talks about the others several years later.
Well. I’m glad there was no one else in the office when I read that. Lots of sad memories. But lovely piece
Thanks Chris.